From time to time people jokingly mention how excessive my activity level is. My favorite remark is that if I'm not burning the candle at both ends and twice in the middle I must be on my death bed. But to be honest, I'm just one of those people that really likes to be busy. This doesn't mean I'm incapable of sitting back and relaxing. I do that too. I will sit on my back deck and watch my boys run and jump in the pool, or we'll go camping and leave all technology behind. But on a day-to-day basis I like to keep in motion.
I think this has always been the case for me. When we moved to the west coast it seemed to get worse. Our move to Whidbey Island, Washington was a result of the Navy base in Brunswick, Maine closing. We were fortunate to be able to choose such a picturesque spot to call home, but I found myself missing all my friends and family. I hadn't moved anywhere with the military, and really hadn't been outside of Maine, aside from my first three years of life in New York and then a short stint in Keene, New Hampshire for my Dietetic Internship.
So here I sat without my usual Thursday night of dance classes (and the dinner and beer afterwards), no shifts at Joshua's Tavern, and no sporadic days of work at Parkview Adventist Medical Center to cover for the regular Dietitian. I was bored. I hate bored. "Only boring people get bored". I was lonely too. I hate lonely. I tried to make friends, but I honestly stink at meeting new people. It irritates me the amount of small talk you have to endure just to get to a point where you can figure out whether you want to spend any real time with these new people. What a waste! Over the years, incidentally, I've reverted back to my old "shock and awe" campaign whereby I say something completely intimate and somewhat ridiculous when I first meet people and then judge their expression to determine whether I've scared them (no friend potential), drinking it in (friend possibility), or invite you to hang out (BFF).
So here I sat in a new location, with essentially no intimate friends, and suddenly my husband was gone. And then he was home for a millisecond, and then he was gone again... and let's just put that theme on repeat for the past 4.5 years. I'd like to say this is an exaggeration. But my family was seriously starting to think I had buried my husband in the backyard because he was never to be seen. And my friends actually started acting surprised if they heard that he was home. If there is a short-end of any stick to be drawn, he'll get it. I take comfort in knowing that he is just really good at his job, and of course they want him doing important things somewhere overseas - but naturally I choose to tease him about his inability to give a good blow job or his pheromones that smell of wide open prison ass being the reason they don't want him around the hangar. Teasing is my wifely duty, one I take very seriously. I think it's sad when marriages lack sense of humor. Seems dull to me.
So I started doing things. Soooooo many different things. I didn't want to have all this time on my hands. I didn't want to be bored and start missing my husband - because there's nothing you can do about his job demands and missing him doesn't make it any better; it just makes you angry.
We were living in a rental house at the time. So all my tools were collecting dust.
My eldest sister was chatting with me one day. She had recently opened up her own salon (Oasis Salon, Presque Isle, Maine) after what... 80 years working for other salons? Jeez, she looks good for her age ;) and she would kill me if she read this. She asked if I had ever made body products. Nope. They kind of scared me. I had been making candles for 5 years at this point, but nobody was rubbing soy wax on their body unless they were into some kinky S&M relationship. They scared me because I certainly didn't want to craft something that someone didn't like on their body or that made them itchy, etc. But I also was intrigued. I started researching. I researched oils, butters, herbal ingredients, preservatives, cosmeceuticals, you name it. Clearly I had the time, so why not? In the end I crafted a few products so she could offer her clients unique products for their lavish pedicures. But it was a new endeavor to fill up some of my time, and Uforya.com was born, with more than enough room to grow and keep me motivated.
I applied to go back to school. I had always wanted a Master's degree but didn't think I wanted it in Nutrition. I thought maybe a complimentary field would be better (back when I was wrapping up my Bachelor's degre) - but at this point in my life I actually wanted to continue with Nutrition and really hone my knowledge and skills in that realm. So from September 2011 to April 2014 I was a full-time graduate student.
In February 2012 we bought our house. Now this was my kind of project. It was a foreclosure that was literally 1/10th of a mile from our rental. It has been one of my favorite projects so far - certainly keeping me plenty busy as it just needed some TLC in every room, on every wall and every floor, and then some.
A few months back now, having my Master's degree under my belt, I applied for and was hired on as the Dietitian at a senior community long-term care facility. In addition to that I also took on a few freelance writing projects, writing up reports and nutrition tips on every topic you can imagine - and some topics that were so horrifically dumb I wished I'd never agreed to them.
Bored Now? No way! Quite the opposite. I've got something I could be doing at any second of any day. Some consider me to be Type A. Like I'm somehow neurotic and don't know how to relax. I don't think that's quite the case. If I want to relax I have every opportunity, and I indulge from time to time. It just so happens that my style of coping with my husband's non-stop detachments (deployments where only portions of the squadron leave) is a little more productive than most.
I'm not mad at someone who deals with their separation by pining for their missing partner, but that's just not my style. I don't watch tv, aside from the occasional late night show when I'm going to bed... I <3 The Soup on E! All these reality [garbage] shows irritate me. I hate listening to people singing on shows just to win some sort of music contract that they haven't spent years in the trenches to earn. I don't do much pleasure reading. I honestly hadn't read anything fiction in years because I was so wrapped up in textbooks... that is until the 50 Shades of Grey movie trailer came out and I seriously then had to indulge in that trilogy. Holy Crap! I mean that stuff takes "pleasure" reading to a whole new level... but I digress.
I'm a worker. I like to keep busy. And when my husband is gone, I miss a little adult conversation from time to time, which is what I occasionally use my blog for - like the most ridiculous sort of diary. I don't do it because I think people will actually read what I write - because my life is not exactly a "page-turner". But I do secretly hope some who stumble across it might find something they could do to occupy their time if they're feeling lonely - and maybe they'll stop pinning things and starting doing these things. Maybe they'll see some project I worked on and think they could do that too.
There is no perfect time to start your life. Imagine if I had waited for my boys to both be in school, or for my husband to be home to support me and grant me uninterrupted time to work on my hobbies. I'd still be waiting... and look at all that wouldn't have been accomplished... and imagine how many useless hours would have been spent sitting on the porch watching the grass grow.
