Gloom and Doom

Well, we're back to the dark season... and in the weeks ahead the days will go so short that I'll start to wonder if they even started. 

When we moved across the country from Maine to Washington I had thought that the weather would be similar... I mean both states are kind of located way up there in the tippy-top corners of the US.  But no, Washington (at least where we live) is much more mild with little shifts in the temperature, but huge shifts with the amount of sunlight we get -  in comparison to Maine.  We get a bad rep for being rainy, but really it's just super drizzly starting about now (September) through to the spring.  Once we hit November there will be days when the sky seems to go dark by 4:00P.

Now that I've properly depressed everyone, I'm desperately trying to figure out how I'm going to keep my energy level up this year while the weather encourages everyone to walk around in comfy sweat pants and never quite crawl out of bed.

I'm stocked up on Vitamin D... popping my 2000 IU's daily since there's zero chance my skin will be making any with the sun not making appearances for weeks at a time.

I even started taking it earlier this year, ordered up my first bottle about 3 weeks ago now.  I feel better... maybe it's all in my head... but who cares if I feel like I have more energy then I'm all for it.  I snag mine off Amazon.  Have you ever used their Subscribe & Save thing?  So you go on their website, you look around for stuff you would normally grab at the grocery store or a Walmart/Target store, stick it in your cart and then decide how frequently you need to get more (it ships as frequently as once a month).  I love it for a couple of reasons. 

1. It's cheaper!  Hello!  I hate giving away my money when I don't have to.  So I just make sure I've got 5 or 6 items coming each month and I save an extra 15% off the price... and BTW the price is already cheaper than Walmart's prices, so double bonus!
2. I don't have to think about it.  I am notorious for getting to snag the paper towels or toilet paper when I'm grocery shopping.  And let me tell you, it's horrible to be the one who finds out you've used the last square and there's no backup supply.
3. My shopping trips are super quick now... and that is an incredibly great thing especially when you're a military wife (whose husband is constantly deployed) who is having to make trips to the grocery store with a pair of insatiable elementary school-age boys!  Grah!  At this point I really just have to hit up the chicken, meat and dairy sections of the store and I can head home - because I have our toiletry products being delivered by Amazon, and I get a weekly produce delivery from a local organic farm - genius!

Wow, I totally went off on a tangent there... back to the task at hand - figuring out how to keep energy levels up while the dark season creeps in.  A couple years ago I had some nursing aid at my doctor's office tell me I should put in daylight light bulbs.

To preserve your sanity, please don't do this!  Maybe this would work well for a desk lamp, or for the occasional light bulb here and there, but my kitchen has approximately 12 recessed lights and replacing all of these with daylight flood bulbs was not only a little expensive for an experiment, but also created the worst lighting ever!  It was bright, that's for sure.  But bright in a sterile, operating room, going to perform brain surgery... and then later make dinner... kind of way.  It was super irritating.  It reminded me of being in a Walmart.  Do those lights make you feel pissed off and angry too?  So lesson learned.  Won't be doing that again.

 

Exercise seems like a good way to keep the energy levels up, so I'll be making a point of getting in the habit of heading over to the gym - as outdoor exercise becomes infrequent.

 

Anyone have any other ideas or things they resort to when the days get super short?

why oh why do I do what I do...

From time to time people jokingly mention how excessive my activity level is.  My favorite remark is that if I'm not burning the candle at both ends and twice in the middle I must be on my death bed.  But to be honest, I'm just one of those people that really likes to be busy.  This doesn't mean I'm incapable of sitting back and relaxing.  I do that too.  I will sit on my back deck and watch my boys run and jump in the pool, or we'll go camping and leave all technology behind.  But on a day-to-day basis I like to keep in motion.

I think this has always been the case for me.  When we moved to the west coast it seemed to get worse.  Our move to Whidbey Island, Washington was a result of the Navy base in Brunswick, Maine closing.  We were fortunate to be able to choose such a picturesque spot to call home, but I found myself missing all my friends and family.  I hadn't moved anywhere with the military, and really hadn't been outside of Maine, aside from my first three years of life in New York and then a short stint in Keene, New Hampshire for my Dietetic Internship.

So here I sat without my usual Thursday night of dance classes (and the dinner and beer afterwards), no shifts at Joshua's Tavern, and no sporadic days of work at Parkview Adventist Medical Center to cover for the regular Dietitian.  I was bored.  I hate bored.  "Only boring people get bored".  I was lonely too.  I hate lonely.  I tried to make friends, but I honestly stink at meeting new people.  It irritates me the amount of small talk you have to endure just to get to a point where you can figure out whether you want to spend any real time with these new people.  What a waste!  Over the years, incidentally, I've reverted back to my old "shock and awe" campaign whereby I say something completely intimate and somewhat ridiculous when I first meet people and then judge their expression to determine whether I've scared them (no friend potential), drinking it in (friend possibility), or invite you to hang out (BFF).

So here I sat in a new location, with essentially no intimate friends, and suddenly my husband was gone.  And then he was home for a millisecond, and then he was gone again... and let's just put that theme on repeat for the past 4.5 years.  I'd like to say this is an exaggeration.  But my family was seriously starting to think I had buried my husband in the backyard because he was never to be seen.  And my friends actually started acting surprised if they heard that he was home.  If there is a short-end of any stick to be drawn, he'll get it.  I take comfort in knowing that he is just really good at his job, and of course they want him doing important things somewhere overseas - but naturally I choose to tease him about his inability to give a good blow job or his pheromones that smell of wide open prison ass being the reason they don't want him around the hangar.  Teasing is my wifely duty, one I take very seriously.  I think it's sad when marriages lack sense of humor.  Seems dull to me.

So I started doing things.  Soooooo many different things.  I didn't want to have all this time on my hands.  I didn't want to be bored and start missing my husband - because there's nothing you can do about his job demands and missing him doesn't make it any better; it just makes you angry.

We were living in a rental house at the time.  So all my tools were collecting dust.

My eldest sister was chatting with me one day.  She had recently opened up her own salon (Oasis Salon, Presque Isle, Maine) after what... 80 years working for other salons?  Jeez, she looks good for her age  ;)   and she would kill me if she read this.  She asked if I had ever made body products.  Nope.  They kind of scared me.  I had been making candles for 5 years at this point, but nobody was rubbing soy wax on their body unless they were into some kinky S&M relationship.  They scared me because I certainly didn't want to craft something that someone didn't like on their body or that made them itchy, etc.  But I also was intrigued.  I started researching.  I researched oils, butters, herbal ingredients, preservatives, cosmeceuticals, you name it.  Clearly I had the time, so why not?  In the end I crafted a few products so she could offer her clients unique products for their lavish pedicures.  But it was a new endeavor to fill up some of my time, and Uforya.com was born, with more than enough room to grow and keep me motivated.

I applied to go back to school.  I had always wanted a Master's degree but didn't think I wanted it in Nutrition.  I thought maybe a complimentary field would be better (back when I was wrapping up my Bachelor's degre) - but at this point in my life I actually wanted to continue with Nutrition and really hone my knowledge and skills in that realm.  So from September 2011 to April 2014 I was a full-time graduate student.

In February 2012 we bought our house.  Now this was my kind of project.  It was a foreclosure that was literally 1/10th of a mile from our rental.  It has been one of my favorite projects so far - certainly keeping me plenty busy as it just needed some TLC in every room, on every wall and every floor, and then some.

A few months back now, having my Master's degree under my belt, I applied for and was hired on as the Dietitian at a senior community long-term care facility.  In addition to that I also took on a few freelance writing projects, writing up reports and nutrition tips on every topic you can imagine - and some topics that were so horrifically dumb I wished I'd never agreed to them.

Bored Now?  No way!  Quite the opposite.  I've got something I could be doing at any second of any day.  Some consider me to be Type A.  Like I'm somehow neurotic and don't know how to relax.  I don't think that's quite the case.  If I want to relax I have every opportunity, and I indulge from time to time.  It just so happens that my style of coping with my husband's non-stop detachments (deployments where only portions of the squadron leave) is a little more productive than most.

I'm not mad at someone who deals with their separation by pining for their missing partner, but that's just not my style.  I don't watch tv, aside from the occasional late night show when I'm going to bed... I <3 The Soup on E!  All these reality [garbage] shows irritate me.  I hate listening to people singing on shows just to win some sort of music contract that they haven't spent years in the trenches to earn.  I don't do much pleasure reading.  I honestly hadn't read anything fiction in years because I was so wrapped up in textbooks... that is until the 50 Shades of Grey movie trailer came out and I seriously then had to indulge in that trilogy.  Holy Crap!  I mean that stuff takes "pleasure" reading to a whole new level...  but I digress.

I'm a worker.  I like to keep busy.  And when my husband is gone, I miss a little adult conversation from time to time, which is what I occasionally use my blog for - like the most ridiculous sort of diary.  I don't do it because I think people will actually read what I write - because my life is not exactly a "page-turner".  But I do secretly hope some who stumble across it might find something they could do to occupy their time if they're feeling lonely - and maybe they'll stop pinning things and starting doing these things.  Maybe they'll see some project I worked on and think they could do that too.

There is no perfect time to start your life.  Imagine if I had waited for my boys to both be in school, or for my husband to be home to support me and grant me uninterrupted time to work on my hobbies.  I'd still be waiting... and look at all that wouldn't have been accomplished... and imagine how many useless hours would have been spent sitting on the porch watching the grass grow. 

The Money Boot

Money is officially the dirtiest, nastiest stuff around.  And now I have just one more reason to think this.  I thought these were just a pair of rubber boots.  Perfect for splashing in puddles (not that we've had any of those in months).  But apparently I'm dead wrong.  What you see before you is what my (now 6 year old) calls his "money boot".

Some people put money in their wallet, some in their purse, some in a piggie bank.  He puts his money in his boot.  I wasn't sure what he meant until I heard him walking around in them yesterday and you could her what sounded like the jingling of a little change purse.

Me - "Hey buddy, why don't you put your money in your bank?"

Him - "Nope, I put it in my money boot!"

And he removed his boot (like I couldn't hear it) to show me that not only was he not wearing any socks - so gross in unbreathing, black rubber boots - but also was carrying around the sweatiest looking dollar bill I've ever seen; and that's saying a lot as I've been to a few strip clubs.

Later last night they pleaded to be taken to the Convergence Zone (CZ) on the navy base so they could play a few video games.  I agreed, but only because I was super tired from working and didn't have the energy to entertain them.  Still in his boots, and a pair of shorts, looking like a hobo, they picked out a game that would entertain them for 30 seconds or so.  He sat down in the video game chair tipping onto his back with his feet in the air.  A shower of loose change was falling out all over him.  I giggled a little and went back to the book I was reading.  After about an hour it was time to head out.  I helped them pick up their Xbox controllers and spied a nickel he had missed.  Wouldn't want him to be missing that so I slipped it into his money boot.  But how dare me!  I had foolishly put the money in the wrong boot!!  I was educated, by my 6 year old, that the money boot was on the "yeft [left] foot".  Jeez, I'm so dumb.

We returned the game and I could not stop giggling the whole way out of the CZ and all the way home.  So while I'm glad that no matter how tired I am they can still make me snicker, I'm also glad they reminded me how much you want to sanitize your hands after you touch money.  Seriously, you never know whose boot it's been in.

Grinding My Teeth Off

Yes, it's been a while since I ventured onto Blogspot to write anything.  I think my mind has been in a bit of a fog.  Most of them time when I feel like writing about something, it's because it was on the top of my mind and I had a clear vision of what I wanted to say.  Not the case lately.

We have been struggling with the mind-numbing task of trying to purchase a home.  My husband's military orders changed, but allowed us to stay here for another three years (at least) so we decided to take the plunge again.  We found a house right around the corner.  And by right around the corner, I mean everytime we had a showing or inspection I've walked to it in about 3 minutes.  The house is in pretty rough shape.  The bones are good, but the inside is pretty nasty.  Grimey, nasty carpet.  Walls that have never known a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.  Laminate flooring which was horribly installed - and that's hard to do with a fool-proof product like this one.  A strange little room built in the garage, with a hole punched in one of the walls.  But surprisingly for a foreclosed home, the kitchen still has all the cabinets and appliances in place - although they are "vintage" (circa 1990) so will need to be pulled eventually.  The house is one story, with 3 bedrooms.  High ceilings in the living room, a big family room that is in the same open area as the kitchen.  A huge yard.  Big deck.  Gigantic garage with shelving built in - well, huge once we get that strange room out of there.

Needless to say, we are excited to get in there and start ripping the nastiness out and putting in the newness.  But here we sit.  I have spent the last month pulling paperwork on a daily basis for the mortgage company.  This process would be so easy if I wasn't going back to school, or trying to grow a business.  If only our bank statement was only one page long, and we only had to show a W2 for my husband... ah, how easy that would be.  But with our complicated finances come days of tedious tasks to prove that the deposit that entered our personal account, from the business account had come from a legitimate source.  And what was this deposit over here, and please write an explanation for your screw-up over here.  I seriously got to the point one day where I thought I was going to lose it.  It simply felt like they were just digging deeper and deeper just looking for that one solid document that indicated that we were huge losers.  :(  My husband wanted to walk away, watching what it was doing to me.  We aren't horrible people.  We owned a home before... in fact, we bought that home with the help of sub-prime lending, maintained the home and when it came time to sell, we were not foreclosed upon or involved in a short sale.  Shouldn't that speak volumes to this mortgage company?? 

We shall see.  Projected closing date for the house around the corner is next week.  Fingers crossed that I don't have to unearth more dusty documents before then.  Hoping everything goes smoothly, because anyone who knows me is aware that I have more than enough things to keep me busy aside from mortgage paperwork... and each one of them has been seriously neglected lately.

Proud of Daddy

Today has definitely been a day of remembrance for me.  I did not know anyone who was killed on 9/11/01 but my heart hurt for all those families who lost loved ones.  I think as each year passes it affects me even more as I think about what it would have felt like to know their children were trapped in the tower, or to know that mothers and fathers perished.  Today certainly reminds me how lucky I am and makes me want to hug and kiss my boys all day.  We skyped with Daddy this morning who has been gone overseas continuing to fight to keep us safe.  We are so proud of him and the work he is doing, and so proud to have him in our family when days like this come around and others are reminded of the sacrifices still being made to keep horrific events from happening on our soil.

Ten years ago I was wrapping up my clinical rotation for my dietetic internship.  I was in my car headed to Southern Maine Medical Center when the news came across the radio.  A plane had hit one of the towers.  I remembering picturing a little cessna.  Something with a few seats that maybe got out of control and nicked the skyscraper.  But then another announcement came on that the second tower had been hit by another plane.  I thought it was a joke.  It wasn't April fool's day, but you never know about the sick humor of some morning radio show hosts.  I got to the hospital and it was on tv's everywhere.  It was like a nightmare.  They kept showing it over and over again, but I couldn't believe it was happening and not just a preview for another end of the world movie.  After leaving the hospital I started calling my parents, but couldn't get ahold of them.  They were nowhere near New York City, but I just wanted to hear their voices.  I wanted to tell them what had happened since I was sure that they had been cut off from the news in their remote location in the eastern Maine woods.  I didn't want to be alone, so I went to the tavern I had been working at and just sat there rolling silverware in napkins with the other employees while we continued to watch the news.  It was scary.  Scary to think that these terrorists could so easily get on board a plane and take it over.  Scary that we had become so complacent with our security measures that something like this could happen.

I remember that day like it was yesterday.  An incredibly sad occasion that still brings tears to my eyes.  I shared minimal footage with my 5-year-old so that he could understand which "bad guys" it was that Daddy leaves us to fight.  He thought it was a movie.  Kept asking if Batman or Spiderman lived in New York City and were going to fight the bad guys.  Sorry, little man, those people had superheroes like the Firefighters to help them out.  And now we have superheroes like Daddy to make sure we stay safe.   

My Life is too Mundane to Blog About.

Are you curious why I started a blog?  Well, while I felt like I might be able to offer words of wisdom from the different things I had experience frequently, I never thought it was worthy of writing about.  And certainly not something anyone would ever want to read.  So I started the blog for myself.  My husband has left, yet again, for a few months abroad and my nights are pretty quiet.  I wouldn't go so far as to say that we have incredibly stimulating conversations every night, but at least having someone else there at the end of the day to share your moments with so nice and surely missed.  So that was the reason for the blog.  Since I can't be sure when he might call or send an email, this was my way of sharing those ridiculous thoughts that stream through my mind.  My hope is that if I'm able to get it out of my system in some format, then maybe I can sleep better at night, and I won't incur extra dental bills from grinding my teeth off.

Me in 1200 words or less?

As I started setting up my blog, this was my first hurdle.  How can I possibly describe my experiences and my thought process in a way that might make people feel a kinship to me?  And then how could I fit my experiences into 1200 words?  Well, I can't.  I suppose I wouldn't have started a blog if I had as little as 1200 words to say about anything.  Then I wondered who would want to read what I had to write?  I'm not a celebrity or the CEO of a major company.  Just a regular girl.  I have two boys, ages 3 and 5 (which I'm sure will provide a large amount of material for me to blog about).  My husband of 6 years is on active duty in the Navy and presently deployed.  I am the owner/operator of West Road Soy Candles as well as Uforya Body.  I was raised in MidCoast Maine and attended the University of Maine where I received my degree in Nutrition.  After graduation I worked as a Dietitian for 7 years and bartended on the weekends (which is how I met my husband).  I currently reside in Washington State and am about to embark on my Master's in Nutrition program in two weeks (eeeek!).

Wow, so I guess I have a little bit of a resume.  So what can you expect from a blog written by me?  I'll be honest.  There really isn't anything I won't discuss.  Takes a lot to make me blush and I haven't come across many topics that I shy away from.  My primary purpose for the blog was a daily outlet for me.  With my husband gone, I find that I observe a lot of different things over the course of a day and then have no one to share them with - preK boys don't want to listen to what I have to say unless I use the word "poop" a lot.  I would like to empower other military spouses to be strong individuals while still being great supporters of their loved ones.  I want to help people who want to take something they love to do and create their own small businesses (love a good entrepreneur).  I want to share my quick wit so that others can find the humor in every situation, because anyone who knows me is well aware that I can't take anything seriously.  Finally, I want to talk maybe just a little here and there about Nutrition, because it is a big interest of mine. 

Well, I think that's a good start.  Doesn't really let you know all that much about me, but I like a little mystery.